32 Weeks
Wow, time has flown by. I can't believe in 8 weeks, we will have a new member of our family. Scratch that, we already have a new member, but we will finally get to meet him/her. Everything we do these days, we already involve the baby. For example, if Hunter wants to wrestle, I say "Do you think that is smart to do with baby?" or if he wants to go to MacDonald's, "Do you think that is healthy for the baby?". I only have 8 more weeks to use the baby as an excuse for what I can and cannot do....and then we are no longer one.
As I have said before, this pregnancy has been so different than with Hunter. First of all, I am of age ( well, sort of). Secondly, I am embracing my new look. I have enjoyed sporting my baby bump, and actually will be kind of sad to say good bye to it....NOT! I have felt so much better this time around because I have stayed committed to working out and staying healthy (somethig I did not do when I was 18).
The biggest difference between my two pregnancies is that surprisingly with this pregnancy, I have been way more anxious. You'd think being an unwed young mother in school would stress me out more, but in fact I remember being relatively calm about Hunter. It was probably me just being naive, but oh how I wish I could feel like that now. This pregnancy has unfortunately been cursed with anxiety and stress, 24/7. That is until I heard something very powerful that I wanted to share.
I was reading a blog the other day about a young mom who is watching her baby fight for his life after nearly drowning in his bathtub. One of her posts simply read, ' I have discovered, there is not room in your heart for both fear and faith...what will you choose?' When I read that, it was like a switch went off. Despite all my wonderful family and friends (including my patient, patient Husband) telling me not to worry and that everything would be OK, it took a stranger's words to really help me to see that I have a choice. I can choose to live every day in fear about my health, my baby's health, and the health of those around me OR I can choose faith. Well folks, after a lot of lengthy conversations with the guy upstairs and mostly with myself, I have decided to choose Faith. It is so amazing that by simply making that commitment in my heart, I have felt UNBELIEVABLE relief that I have been searching for these past 32 weeks. I now just wait for the baby to wake up and start kicking me, instead of laying down for an hour and anxiously waiting to feel some movement. And surprisingly, I feel like baby has started moving so much more since I have stopped worrying about it....amazing how things work.
So I will leave you with this. Is there something in your life that has happened or is currently unfolding that forces you to choose fear or faith. If there is, than I challenge you to make the commitment to faith, and make that commitment whole heartedly. And I promise you, your life will change drastically. Choose to believe, and choose to trust that God has you in the palm of his hands and no matter what happens, he is not going to let go!
